Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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