im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
