I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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