Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
