IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
