I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
