How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
