I am in a vortex of obligation.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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