return my video game
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Randomize
