Buhtt sex?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize