But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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