What did we do last night that was yellow?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Randomize