Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Randomize
