Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
