Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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