YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
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