i permit you to call me
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
