As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
