It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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