I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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