Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
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