shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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