it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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