My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
