so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
