State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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