Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
