So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
