dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
