The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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