is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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