I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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