I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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