he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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