Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
