around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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