dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Randomize
