Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
