Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I think my vagina is haunted
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
