Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize