I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Sponge bath it is.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
