Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
