is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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