Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
