i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
