the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
