what day is it and did you see me today?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
