omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
