So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
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