My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
